a new thing guys are trying apparently

The first time someone asked for social media instead of my phone number was at a house party in Roselle. It was a few years back already (early instagram era). This one guy I never saw before was half-sweating me. It was like he wasn’t actually trying to talk to me, he just wanted me to know that I looked good. Cool.

Then he asked for my IG. I told him I didn’t have one. He put his phone back down, kind of disappointed.  He must have figured I’d have an interesting internet presence based off how I looked. So he thought he’d stay in contact with me that very vague way but just to watch me.

Fast forward to the other night…

Was at some little event and two separate guys tried this other new thing I’ve never seen before. It’s the anti-thesis of asking for your IG. And it was one guy right after the other who did it. I really can’t believe it could ever work. I mean, I thought the first guy was maybe drunk or something, but then the second guy did it. I was like ??

But ok. They each talked or joked around for a few minutes with me and my sister (one longer than the other) before taking their phones out. Then they kind of flashed it at us like they were selling it, saying “you want to keep in touch?” That question was asked to both of us or to either of us?!? I don’t even know.

It was the most vague vague vague shit I’ve ever seen. And I love guys from nj, but I just have to say that a dude from nyc would NEVER. They don’t mind getting shot down (at all), and that move is such an obvious effort to not get shot down. You can’t get turned down if you don’t actually go for it, right? But you also gotta be in it to win it, and that’s nowhere near it.

That move was just toooooooooooo easy to say no to because of how fake casual it is. So just either of us? Be in contact with you in any way? Huh??

I was drunk already to begin with, so I told both of them I was chilling.

The best part, though, is that when one of them was in the hallway walking away, he turned back to say something like “o yea cuz I don’t just like kiki-ing.” But all we were doing was jokes… so number one yes you do! And number two: you thinking I was gonna fuck you at some point is something to really kiki about.

He had me laughing until the last second–I’ll give him that.

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