CHEAP SEX by Mark Regnerus

Regnerus is a sociologist who defines cheap sex as sex that doesn’t require a lot of work [for men]. Porn, online dating, and the Pill are a few of the cultural markers that have cheapened sex. As a result, people are having more non-marital sex, but they aren’t any more fulfilled.

A big factor in all of this is that women are having sex with men they barely like fast as hell, which is fine in theory, but they’re also hoping that ~one day~ they’ll meet someone to really be with. But that “just sex” with those men is directly contributing to the climate of cheap sex because men will do what it takes to have sex and not much more. That might also explain why men today are less inclined to have their shit together or to excel in school or at a job–because they still get sex even if they are useless.

So he doesn’t respect your sexual freedom, he’s just happy it’s so cheap.


  1. Another thing I keep thinking with this is the fact that most men and women, gay straight, etc. in America want to get married at some point. Women, however, are more likely to end a marriage than men, and more likely to report unhappiness. So that kinda implies that women are also marrying down in terms of genuine compatibility. Just marrying to marry and get off the field.

    He mentions how people are in the presence of just more people. That’s what Perel (previous post) would call a third person in a long term monogamous relationship. People are kinda willing to see what’s out there because of how datingTM has been commodified. Dating apps like Tinder, for example, provide a larger group of even just potential sexual options. They’re profiting off very cheap sex (one guy said he spend $80 on four girls). And it’s good for the companies for hookups to be cool because it keeps the business afloat.

    One thing I can say is that men act mad entitled to sex. They’re expectation of (or persistence for) sex can even occasionally get them sex. And then, more generally, toxic sex is fun mostly because that’s the only positive treatment you’re getting [from them]. That makes the sex extra good. Since it’s the only good. It’s madness all around.


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