Another day 24

Newark NJ 6/10/2021

Sunday 6/6/2021

  • Am I posting on IG because I’m spiraling or because I’m doing good… the world may never know…
  • And their joy in each other was unparalleled. -Barbara Taylor Bradford, A Secret Love Affair
  • She was falling in love with him. She shouldn’t, but she was, and she didn’t know how to stop herself. -Barbara Taylor Bradford
  • Emotion. Love. Warmth. Companionship. True feelings shared. Sexual love. Understanding. Was that too much to ask of a man? Surely not. Certainly it was not too much for her to give. -Barbara Taylor Bradford
  • Certainly she had loved him a lot, put all of her trust in him. and in the end he had bitterly disappointed her. But no, wait, it was so much more than disappointment, wasn’t it? He had humiliated her, made her feel foolish, even ridiculous, and he had hurt her so badly she thought she would never recover from that hurt. It cut deep… deep into her very soul. -Barbara Taylor Bradford
  • Reading to cope.

Monday 6/7/2021

  • Hate when I choose sadness for hours even tho I know I could just smoke and be fine.

Tuesday 6/8/2021

Newark NJ 6/10/2021
  • Who to be, how to be.
  • Understand that if there’s a cheesecake flavor then that’s what I’m getting.

Wednesday 6/9/2021

  • Getting by by looking good every single day.

Thursday 6/10/2021

  • “Why are you so honest in your books?”
    Cuz… who’s gonna check me??
  • He was more so asking about me casually saying “oh I went to go smoke a joint.” He’s like he would never say that… so why be honest about it…
  • Reading Covering Islam now because I gave that book to this guy who I think is actually reading it. I also just love Edward Said so it’s no problem to put it at the top of my reading list.
  • The prison don’t want to print something for someone… so I print it and mail it… then the prison has to photocopy my piece of paper and give it to him lol like what…
  • Anyway that person was like I get that your writing is about your body and your being but the honesty is surprising.
  • “Do you ever get tired of men telling you you’re beautiful?”
  • Lol
  • My son needed 6 braids today because he’s turning six lol.
  • Hiking then biking is a good line-up.

Friday 6/11/2021

  • Zoos and aquariums might be the most depressing places on earth. Turned live wild animals into groups of critters begging for treats in the back hallway of a mall. Sad.
Newark NJ 6/15/2021

Saturday 6/12/2021

  • Drinking is cancelled. I don’t even get drunk but then I can’t sleep. DEFINITELY don’t need more conscious hours a day to be sad. Plz.
  • *simultaneously, the second I walk in the room*
    me: hey you like these shoes?
    my son: where you goin??
  • Mandatory $9 urgency fee on western union transfers to prison… don’t like…
  • Majored in self-medication.
  • Told my son he wasn’t allowed to turn 6 and he said that’s not how time works :/
  • Bought some books yesterday in real life and it wasn’t the best selection but anything I saw by Toni Morrison and Sophie Kinsella are now mine.
  • Things happen and I turned inward.

Sunday 6/13/2021

  • “News” does not just happen. -Edward Said
  • For the first time in history (for the first time, that is, on such a scale) the Islamic world may be said to be learning about itself by means of images, histories, and information manufactured in the West. This was dramatically in evidence during the Gulf War when CNN was watched by most Arabs (including, it is rumored, Saddam Hussein) as the principal source on the war. -Edward Said

Monday 6/14/2021

  • Thinking to put out another poetry book before the Spanish translation stories.

Tuesday 6/15/2021

Newark NJ 6/15/2021
  • All knowledge is interpretation, and that interpretation must be self-conscious in its methods and its aims if it is to be vigilant and humane, if it is also to arrive at knowledge. -Edward Said
  • Added two knew books to my bookstore—Another Country by James Baldwin and Strange Fruit: The Biography of a Song by David Margolick.
  • Wearing a lil black dress with my new shoes cuz that’s just who I am!
  • Another day
  • Why am I getting so many hey strangers texts? It’s retrograde or something?
  • Bro driving a FUCKED up car talking about some damn hello!!… ummm goodbye!! Lol like what…
  • One of my first romantic situations ever was a guy liking me and my best friend liking him and me just caring about being friends with her lol.
  • 7pm five feet ten inches and 115 pounds did not bode well for a hard night out (although, in retrospect, it bodes very well for employment at a fashion magazine). -Lauren Weisberger

Wednesday 6/16/2021

  • What’s the big idea??
  • Me? Cooking on a night I don’t have my son???… yea no.
Newark NJ 6/18/2021

Thursday 6/17/2021

  • Remember when they had us wait a week before they told us Biden won lol
  • Only 2 songs that matter right now are “be with you” by Beyoncé and “free smoke” by Drake.

Friday 6/18/2021

  • Mentally, I’m in a book. The Devil Wears Prada to be specific.
  • Heels and a mini skirt and a tube top… I’m thinkin yes…

Saturday 6/19/2021

  • Persevering cuz there’s nothing else to do.

-Rachel Wagner

My books: 
– Jacob’s Hip: Poems
– FEM: New Millennium Beauty & Fashion
– Abandonment Issues: Alive in New Jersey
– Back Like I Never Left: Dating as a Single Mother

My bookstore: Ten Dollar Books

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